Sunday, August 21, 2011

Douchebags vs. Karaoke (or the Eric Dravens vs. the Brandon Lees)

I'm going to try to explain why karaoke can be art.

Still there? Good.

It's so funny what happens now that we're flooded with music. Music music music. On the TV. In the car. At the work desk. In the earbuds. But still, even though we have the chance at all times to listen to whatever we want and not the radio, some people (I'll call them douchebags) can't deal with radio hits we all know the words to. So when my friend Boris brought his karaoke party to a goth bar nearby, the douchebags showed their douchebag fangs.

One Eric Draven in particular wanted to fight Boris. It didn't help that Boris loves to sing or that his voice has a sort of Old Man River flavor to it, or that Boris opened the evening with It's Raining Men. Surprisingly, none of that helped. But the place filled up regardless. People came from all around, and soon the douchebags were outnumbered.

The moral (but not the end) of this story is that douchebags are an angry, angry lot. If you ever want to do something that makes you happy regardless of what other people think of you, think long and hard because a douchebag is lurking. And he can't see through his or her own bullshit. Onward.

In Spain, when someone is doing a performance of any kind you sometimes hear people say "Arte!" It's rare and it's hard to translate*, but basically means their performance was beautiful and moving**. The people with the most Arte aren't necessarily the most talented. What they are doing is just being themselves, which is hard to do in front of a crowd of people. I have a hunch that a lot of the great portrait painters and directors recognize Arte in people better than us normal folk, and aim to capture just that.

So maybe it sounds strange, but sometimes you catch that Arte at a karaoke night or two. It's not every time. Takes balls to get up there though, not fangs.

p.s. Boris doesn't know I'm writing about him. He might not think it good for business to talk about the douchebags in attendance. But I might argue that it's great for business. Someone has to sing Anarchy in the UK.

Here's where you find out about his karaoke nights:

*Not really. Arte means art.
**One example of Arte might be this if you like Italian karaoke:


  1. Cerna Vdova is NOT a goth bar. Im not sure which guy you are referring to but there's always one, isn't there? Thanks for coming to karaoke.

    Ari from Cerna Vdova

  2. No offense intended :) Keep the karaoke coming. You are keepers of the Eternal Flame! :)